


Razor Edged

by Recalcitrant_Slytherin_Slut



Series: Shattered Mirrors [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Original Work
Genre: Angst, Depression, F/M, Family Drama, First Times, Forced Bonding, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Mentions of Suicide, Mentions of War, PTSD, Self-Harm, kind of dubcon but not really?, more like he wasn't emotionally okay with having sex, oh boy, please just proceed with extreme caution if you are easily triggered, there is nothing sexually explicit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-20
Updated: 2014-02-20
Packaged: 2018-01-13 04:58:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,429
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1213561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Recalcitrant_Slytherin_Slut/pseuds/Recalcitrant_Slytherin_Slut
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You have to read Pieces first or this will make zero sense.</p><p>It's Yule and family drama is nigh!</p>
            </blockquote>





	Razor Edged

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ColeyandCo](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ColeyandCo/gifts).



> THIS TOOK ME FOREVER OMC
> 
> Writer's block is a bitch.
> 
> Coley: I love you and I miss you buuuuuuut MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY BIRTHDAY AND HERE'S YOUR VALENTINE ALL IN ONE! I really hope you enjoy it because, let's be honest, there wouldn't be a story if it weren't for you. <3
> 
> Also, this hasn't had the editing I would usually put my work through because I was so thrilled to have it done and I just wanted to get it up, but I'll be going back over it, if you find anything glaringly awful, drop me a line please! Also, my French is hella rusty

The trouble with flooing, Lena thought as she stepped out of the manor fireplace, is you get ash fucking everywhere. She reached down to shake the soot off her dress before she set off for her room.

The wonderful thing about the floo though: Lena didn't have to try and find an empty compartment on the train.

No. No. Those were dangerous thoughts. She had avoided thinking about the boys for the last fortnight. She wasn't about to break now. Even if she did miss them desperately. Even if she hadn't slept properly since she left, the circles under her eyes deepening with every pass of the moon through the night. Even if she had started going through a pack and a half a day again.

She was saved from that particularly destructive train of thought by her brother sweeping into the room. They stood across from one another, Gaius gauging Lena's response to him. When their gazes connected, Gaius felt his heart stutter. Her usually expressive, stormy eyes were flat and blank. She had always been pale, but a healthy, creamy pale. Now she looked ashen. Her skin acquiring a grayish tinge. There were dark circles ringing her eyes, and her lips were chapped; the rosy skin cracking painfully.

Gaius felt guilt well up inside him. He had been telling himself that giving Amelia permission was what was best for Lena and the family. His baby sister had spent her entire life preparing to be a High Society wife. Learning to plan parties and color coordinate, being taught how to please her husband, and well versed in sweet submission. She needed a husband in order to function. She needed to be owned, he was sure of it. Gaius saw how lost she was when Theo died. She floated around, unsure what to do with herself now that her forever had been obliterated. He was just giving her her life back, was that so wrong?

Gaius shook himself. He never should have allowed her to go back to Hogwarts. It isn't like an education was necessary for her. She had no need to work for a living. The only thing that made him send her back was his father's desire to see all of his children graduated. Now he was beginning to regret that decision. Clearly those boys had twisted her somehow. He had known it the moment she raised her voice to him. He had been appalled to learn she was staying in those rooms with two men. What had she been thinking? They were lucky her new suitor had attended Emrys Academy in New York, and therefore didn't have any connections to Hogwarts that could cast doubt on Lena's reputation.

"I will leave you to get settled, I just wanted to see you got home." Gaius finally broke the silence.

Lena nodded mutely, moving past him with an elegance and grace that could easily inspire envy. She had every intention of avoiding her family as much as humanly possible this holiday.

x*x*x*x*x*

The following afternoon found Lena standing in her dead fiancè's bedroom with Draco Malfoy.

They had been sorting through his possessions in relative silence for several hours, but Lena wasn't oblivious to the concerned looks the Malfoy heir was sending her way.

"If this is too much for you Lena, I can handle it on my own." Draco offered, halting her movement with a hand on her arm.

"I assure you, Mr. Malfoy, I'm quite alright." She answered as she slipped away from his touch.

"Lena. I promised Theo I would take care of you if anything happened to him, just like he promised to look after Astoria. Now, normally I'm happy to let you grieve. I've stood back and watched you pick yourself back up, not because I don't care but because I can't fix you. The damage the war caused is something you have to come to terms with, and I've been happy to observe; ready to step in only if you needed me. It looks like that time has come." He guided Lena to sit on Theo's bed. "Talk to me. What's going on?"

Lena shook her head and made to stand back up, only to be trapped by Draco's arm across her waist.

"I am fine, Draco. Honestly, just a little fatigue."

"I've seen death look better than you do, Lena. Cut the shit."

Lena dropped her head into her hands. "They've found me a new fiancè. I'll meet him in five days."

"Well. That's not ideal, I'll admit, but unless you're trying to scare him off by convincing him you're terminally ill, I'm not sure I understand your angle." Draco half teased.

"I had to stop seeing my friends." Lena whispered, feeling the all too familiar burn behind her eyes.

"The ragtag band of misfits you found?" Draco chuckled. When Lena shot him a watery glare, he sobered. "Why did you have to stop seeing them?"

"Because apparently hanging out with them was ruining my reputation, and this engagement was their way of correcting my 'out of hand' behavior." Lena flopped back on Theo's bed gracelessly.

"Who is your new betrothed?" Draco asked curiously.

"Maximillius Grant. He's an American."

Lena felt Draco tense beside her.

"Lena." His voice was measured and forced calm as he pulled her to sit up, and connected their gaze. "Listen to me. You cannot marry him."

Lena would have laughed at Draco for being overly dramatic if his tone hadn't sent goosebumps scattering across her skin. "You know something I don't, Draco. Tell me."

"I met Max through my servitude to the Dark Lord. He was head of the group set up to infiltrate the American Ministry. He's a Blue Blood politician, from old Southern money. Lena, he had a choice and he chose Voldemort. He is cold and cruel, and I have it on good authority that he enjoys abusing his partners." Draco's weighed each word as he spoke. He didn't want to scare Lena, but she needed to be aware of the situation. He watched in blatant admiration as Lena processed the information before straightening her spine.

"That's... good to know, and I thank you for the heads up, but what would you like me to do about it? If I refuse, I'm a disgrace and I risk being disowned and publicly shamed. Not that my status means much to me, but you know how spiteful our society can be, Draco. I would rather not give anyone reason to curse my bloodline for the next seven generations. I'm stuck. I have no choice and no say. Not to mention, if this Maximillius is as cruel as you say, what lengths would he go to to avenge a public rejection? Is it a risk I can afford to take?" Lena reasoned. "I can protect myself. I'll give him an heir within the first year and then do what every other abused wife in our circle does: stay at the summer estate in Paris."

"North Carolina." Draco corrected.

"I'm sorry?"

"His summer estate is in North Carolina. Nice place, right on the sand of a private beach."

"Right. Well, regardless of where, I'll just move in there and anytime he comes to stay, I'll coincide a visit home. Come on, Draco, your mother did it for years. The only time she was ever at the manor was when you were, and that was only because Lucius wouldn't touch her with you around." Lena kept her tone purposely flippant.

"That's my point, Lena. I want more for you than what my mother had. You deserve better than that." Draco offered.

"That's the thing about life though, Draco. Very rarely do you get what you deserve."

They laid on the bed for a long while, the sharp winter sunlight softening as it cast increasingly longer shadows over the walls. Finally they agreed to finish tomorrow, and Draco treated them to dinner at that new place in Diagon Alley.

x*x*x*x*x*

"Lena?"

The distracted teen turned at her name, staring blankly at the small chest Draco was thrusting in her direction with an embarrassed flush.

Curiosity had Lena flipping the little wooden box open, wondering what could make the usually composed heir, blush.

She found the picture immediately. There was a little stack of them resting on top of the letters and other trinkets.

Seeing the topmost one she knew immediately when it was taken and why it made Draco so uncomfortable.

It was a black and white photo that could almost pass for a muggle print given that it had been taken while she was asleep, the only movement the slight rise and fall of her back.

She was laying on her stomach, blankets pooled around her waist, hair fanned across the pillow. Her entire back was exposed, skin glowing faintly in the moonlight that fell in strips across the bed. She could make out all the cuts and bruises from the skirmish she'd gotten caught in the middle of at Diagon Alley the weekend previous. Her profile was framed against the grey of her pillowcase, lips slightly parted, eye lashes casting shadows across her cheek. She could see the outer curve of her breast, the lean line of her rib cage, just the top of a sharp hip bone. Her knee was exposed above the blanket, her long arms wrapped around her pillow.

It was such an intimate and vulnerable position. Something only a lover should ever see.

She knew Theo liked to photograph her. She knew there was an entire robe box full of pictures of her here, somewhere. The ones here must have been his favorites. Lena couldn't help but wonder why. What made these so special?

She flipped to the next photo. A muggle still caught just as she was turning around. Hair flying around her, eyes full of mirth, her mouth frozen in laughter. The sun lit her up from behind, giving the whole picture an ethereal quality. She smiled softly. This one had been taken the day before Theo took the mark. There were snowflakes caught in her hair, and she was bundled up in thick winter apparel. She remembered that shortly after the picture was taken, all hell broke loose in the form of a snowball fight.

Next was another wizard frame, in color this time. She was sitting in the window seat of her bedroom, smoking a cigarette. Nothing on except Theo's shirt, her long, bare legs curled underneath her as she gazed up at the sky through the open window.

It all came rushing at her in that moment. How quickly everything was moving. Hell, less than a year ago, she was an almost widow. She had been facing the daunting task of finding who she was without Theo attached to her.

Funny thing was, she enjoyed that girl. The one she was with Percy and Oliver and Reese. She liked how free and unrestrained they had made her.

When Theo had died, it had terrified Lena. She had been raised her entire life to be his wife. She had been molded to Theo, conditioned to love him, forged to perfectly fit him. He had guided her every thought and opinion. She knew how lucky she was that her betrothed wasn't a violent or cruel man. She had struck gold with him. But that didn't change how it made her feel to realize she had never been Lena. Had never even been given a chance. It didn't change the betrayed pang in her chest when she realized that the girl Theo loved, was the one he himself made. Didn't stop the tears when she realized that the person she wanted to be, the woman she was becoming, was someone he might not be able to love.

And now she had been given a new fiancè. Which was.... disheartening. The process of reforging her personality to suit him would be painful and confusing.

Lena felt the anger clawing at her chest, choking her with fiery fingers. Before she even registered the motion, she was fluidly hurling the wooden box against the wall opposite her. Draco's arms wrapped firmly around her, but Lena didn't want to be comforted. She wanted to scream and rage. She really wanted to punch something. The physical motion of throwing the small chest had felt good. She wanted more. A voice that sounded suspiciously like her sister reminded her that displays of anger were the opposite of ladylike. Lena decided she didn't rightly give two fucks.

"FUCK THIS! FUCK EVERYTHING! FUCK THEO AND MY FAMILY AND MY NEW FIANCÈ! FUCK LIVING AND DYING AND FEELING! I AM SO SICK TO DEATH OF TRYING TO BE PERFECT, OF ALWAYS OBEYING! AND FOR WHAT? I'M LOYAL TO A FAMILY THAT BETRAYS ME! THAT WAS CONTENT TO STAND BY AND ALLOW ME TO BE CONSUMED BY A MAN WHO ONLY LOVED ME BECAUSE HE CREATED ME! FUCK THIS! God just-" at some point, Lena had begun beating against Draco's chest. Her voice broke, and she grabbed handfuls of the blonde heir's shirt as her anger finally snapped; leaving her feeling empty and cold.

"Lena..." Draco began softly. He froze when Lena laughed coldly.

"What could you possibly have to say, Draco? You agree and you betray a dead friend, you disagree and you piss me off. Best to stop while you're ahead." Lena advised.

She watched in detached amusement as Draco flinched at the flat cold of her voice.

"I was just going to say that you have every right to feel the way you feel. This must be a very confusing time for you. I understand being angry. Just make sure you direct it where it belongs. Theo loved you, Lena. Not just because you were well mannered and intelligent and obedient, but also because you were fiery, compassionate, clever. All things that were purely you. Yes, you were shaped by Theo, but not intentionally. Lena, that boy would have loved you even if you were a Hufflepuff. Even if he hadn't had an influence. I think you give him too much credit, you have always been more your own person than you realise. Besides, he tried to convince you to run away and marry him almost exactly a year ago and you had been fighting on opposite sides for how long by then? Do not ever doubt his love for you, Lena." Draco reasoned calmly.

Guilt made Lena's stomach turn. "What about my love for him? Can I doubt that?" She whispered brokenly.

Draco connected their gazes, storm clouds and the sea drawing comfort from one another.

"I think I speak for Theo when I say: do whatever you have to do to move on. He loved you so much Lena, more than I could ever hope to make you comprehend. He would want you happy. He would want you safe and cared for and loved. Do whatever you have to do to get there." Draco advised.

Lena nodded once. She looked towards where she had thrown the box. Saw the contents spilled across the stone floor. A road map of their relationship. The only physical reminders of a love, long dead.

It struck Lena, how meaningless those trinkets and tokens would be to anyone else. How silly one would think keeping a cork from a bottle of wine.

But they didn't know that bottle of wine was drank the first time they made love.

Or the handkerchief stained with mascara, from the night Theo held her as she sobbed, fingers clumsily tracing the new mark branded on his pale forearm. It was the first tears he'd seen her cry since they were children.

She dropped to her knees, picking up the pieces, replacing them to their box. The action felt oddly heavy.

x*x*x*x*x*

"Mr. Grant will be in London on business Wednesday. You will meet him for lunch at Nightingale's at 12:30 sharp. He's already made reservations."

Lena turned from where she was storing some of Theo's old things in her closet.

Her sister stood, framed by her doorway. Looking delicately beautiful in a crimson silk gown. The rich colour emphasizing her dark, shiny curls, and big, brown, doe eyes.

"What happened to meeting his family?" Lena wondered.

"Turns out he's the Patriarch of his family. He wishes to meet you here for lunch. Not that it's of any consequence to you. You do as you're told and go where directed. I'm not sure where you got the idea it was your right to question his decisions, but I would suggest losing that notion. Quickly."

Lena clenched her jaw, drawing a deep breath to calm herself before responding. "I may as well do some shopping while I'm there. I have a few things to pick up before returning to school."

"Didn't Gaius speak to you? You won't be returning. You have no need for an education. Besides, you'll be far too busy planning your wedding." Amelia informed her, a cruel smirk twisting her cherry painted lips.

Lena kept her back turned to her sister until she was positive her mask was firmly in place.

She gave her sister a serene smile, nodding delicately. "Yes, of course. It would be silly to finish an education I will never use. A waste, really."

Amelia smiled beautifully at her younger sister. "I'm glad you're seeing reason."

x*x*x*x*x*

Percy put the final sticking charm on the carefully wrapped gift. He would give Reese and Oliver their gifts when they met in Diagon Alley for lunch, Wednesday. But he wanted to get Lena's out today. He used another adhesive charm to stick a roll of parchment beside the bow. He had sent her a letter everyday since she left. Little ones about how they were. About Reese coming back, and Oliver coping, or not coping as the case may be. He just wanted to let her know. Knew leaving wasn't her choice, and she would still be with them if she could be.

They had all handled her leaving differently. Reese was sullen and weepy as he sat smoking in the window. Oliver was angry, he had taken to slamming shit around for hours after anyone dared mention her name. Percy? Percy couldn't stand the empty bed. Couldn't sleep at night without the comfortable warmth of her slender body pressed against his side. He missed teasing her in the morning, when she was still blurry and half asleep. He ached when he woke up from nightmares and realized she wasn't there to hold him. Missed the deep talks at three in the morning.

He didn't tell her. Couldn't. He wasn't trying to guilt her, that wasn't the point of the letters. He knew she left to protect them. Knew it would have hurt her entirely too much to try and stay. So he wrote to let her know he still loved her. That he was still here, that he still cared. He wrote to give her a measure of peace.

He just hoped she understood.

As Percy passed the guestroom on the way to the kitchen, he heard sniffling. He paused, straining his ears. Crying wasn't exactly uncommon in his house, not since the war. But this was different. It wasn't the pitching keen of his mother, but a deeper, rougher sob.

Oliver.

Percy hesitated briefly before pushing the door open. The sight that greeted him made his chest ache.

Oliver was curled up in the middle of the bed, body bent protectively around the shirt he had his nose buried in. It took Percy a second to place it, but once it clicked together, he felt his heart break.

His old practice shirt. The one Lena always wore to bed.

He knew it smelled like her. Not just her perfume and soap, but the inherently unique smell of her skin. The smell that, after months of receiving comfort, seemed to have a Pavlovian response for the boys. That smell meant safety. It meant love, and affection, compassion, and understanding. It was the smell of coming home. Cigarettes and spicy sweet perfume, and the soft edge of sleep warmed skin.

Percy was three steps from the bed when a new smell hit him. A sort of sweet, cloying, metallic smell. It took his preoccupied brain a second to supply him with an answer. Blood.

Percy closed his eyes, and willed away the dull ache in his chest. It wasn't fair, they were too young to hurt this much!

But there was nothing for it, they all had a vice.

Percy felt helplessness wash over him. He couldn't fix this, didn't even know where to start. And the only person that would even be able to offer an iota of comfort was locked up in a manor somewhere, being treated like a rare porcelain doll.

With a weary sigh Percy sat on the bed behind his friend, running a soothing hand across his back.

"Ollie, I need you to calm down buddy. You got to let me check you out." Percy whispered softly.

Oliver tried to curl in further but only ended up crying out as an older cut split open at the strain, weeping crimson sluggishly.

Percy felt himself begin to panic. They needed Lena. She was brilliant in a crisis. She always knew just what to do. There was so much blood, the stench of it turning the Keeper's stomach. In desperation he knelt in front of his fireplace, reaching up to grab floo powder from the pot.

"Lena Grey, Grey Estate and Manor!"

x*x*x*x*x*

Lena had been curled up in the window seat since her earlier conversation with Amelia. She looked over the grounds with a detached air as her brain chased itself in circles. The only comfort she had had was that she could escape to school for the next two years. She would be able to keep an eye on the boys and lose herself in her studies. With any luck, she might even be able to forget the whole engagement for a little while.

Now. Now she had nothing.

Lena was interrupted from her musings by the fireplace roaring to life.

"Lena! Lena, oh Merlin I need your help! He won't- And I can't- and there's so much blood. Dear Morgana!"

"Percy? Darling, please calm down. I can't understand you love." Lena hit her knees in front of the green flame.

"It's Oliver. He's staying with me over Holiday and I think he's finally cracked. He won't stop crying and there's blood everywhere. I don't know what to do, Lena! I can't get him to calm down and this isn't my area. Please. Please I need your help. You're the only one who can fix it!" Percy rambled, wringing his hands.

And just like that, Lena was back to square one. Heart aching as she listened to Percy, the faint strains of broken sobbing drifting through the connection. She didn't even think as she reached out her hand to summon her wand and stepped through the emerald fire.

The scent of blood hung heavily in the air.

Lena made a noise of frustration as she tripped over the hem of her gown in her haste to get to the bed.

"Oliver! I need you to lay on your back, sweetheart!" Lena called as she rushed across the room.

At the sound of her voice, Oliver whimpered curling in tighter.

"Oliver, love." Lena whispered as she ran slender fingers through his hair and down over a sweat dampened brow. "You have got to roll over, my darling. I need to assess the damage."

When Oliver did nothing but cry harder, Lena turned to Percy. "Do you have any Dreamless Sleep?" Percy nodded. "I need a vial."

Percy ran to his room to grab the requested potion.

"Hold him down." Lena instructed before wrenching Oliver's jaw open and tipping the sweet potion onto his palate. She quickly slammed her palm over his mouth and used her other hand to massage his throat, forcing him to swallow the sedative.

Percy held the thrashing teen down as best he could, his hands struggling to get a firm grip as they slipped through the never ending streams of scarlet. After a few moments, Oliver went slack in the Keeper's hold.

"Lay him flat on his back." Lena instructed calmly, already rummaging around in a satchel Percy didn't even notice she had brought through the floo with her.

She used magic to remove Oliver's shirt before setting her wand aside in favour of a swatch of sterile gauze and some rubbing alcohol.

She moved methodically, starting at his left arm, moving across his chest and abdomen, before finishing with his right arm. At some point she had sent Percy for a bowl of water and some towels.

Percy was content to watch her work, ready to fetch anything she needed.

She pulled a crystal bottle full of a muddy green substance out of the satchel.

"Essence of Ditany." She answered the unasked question without looking up from her task, dabbing it into the deeper cuts, and bandaging the rest.

When she finished, she washed the blood from her hands in the bowl of water she had mixed with astringent to keep everything clean as she worked.

"He'll wake up in about six hours." She whispered, finally meeting the gentle chocolate eyes of her best friend.

"He'll be pissed if he realizes you've left." Percy tells her.

Lena thought for a moment. "May I use your floo? I need to make a call." She waits for the affirming nod before moving to the simple fireplace. "Draco Malfoy, Malfoy Estate and Manor."

"Lena. You are not at home." Draco observed.

"You're skills of observation are as astute as ever, Malfoy. I need you to cover for me." Lena offered, what she hoped, was a winning smile.

Draco sighed loudly. "Well, you aren't sneaking out to Theo's anymore, care to tell me where you are?"

"There was... a bit of an emergency. I left without informing an-"

"Ah. The ragtag band of misfits in over their heads again?" Draco interrupted.

Lena shot him a haughty glare through the emerald flame.

"I'll pop into your room and leave a note for Gaius, tell him I found something at Theo's that needed your attention. Is that satisfactory?" Draco relented.

"Thank you so much, Draco! I owe you!" Lena gave him a rare, genuine smile.

Draco's face softened for a moment. "Just... be careful. And send for me if you need anything, alright?"

"I've got it handled, but I really do appreciate it, Draco." Lena replied before bidding him goodbye and severing the connection.

"Thank you. For coming. And fixing things. I just... I panicked. I'm not good at- You always knew- I can't do this." Percy groaned as he dropped his head into his hands, waiting for his comprehension of the English language to catch up with him.

"I'll always help where I can, Percy. I just have a duty that requires my presence elsewhere. I.... Well I suppose I ought to warn you. I won't be returning to school after break." She tried so hard to appear unaffected by this, to keep her voice steady and her demeanor politely detached.

She knew by the look of pity Percy had aimed at her that she had failed. "Has the wedding been moved up?"

"No. Gaius and Amelia decided that I should focus on planning the big day instead of a useless education I'll never have the occasion to use." And if Lena sounded bitter, well she had revealed worse to Percy in the past.

"For what it's worth, I'm sorry. Will you get in trouble if I keep sending you letters? It might help break up the monotony, at the very least." Percy wanted to keep contact, no matter how one sided. But one look at Lena and he knew something was wrong.

"Percy, I haven't received any- Arianna. Of course!" She answered her own question. Well, at least she knew why her cousin had been acting so odd.

"What about her?" Percy asked in confusion.

"She's been intercepting my mail again." Lena snapped, anger coloring her tone.

"Again?"

"Arianna had a crush on Theo. She's set to marry an older man from a lesser family, and that's always been a sore spot. So when Theo left school after taking the mark, he would write me letters. Arianna thought she could get between us by stealing my mail. Fortunately, my fiancè was an incredibly intelligent man and caught on fairly quickly." Lena explained. "It would seem she's at it again."

"But... She seems so nice!" Percy exclaimed.

"She is! I love her dearly, but she's a Slytherin through and through. The End justifies the Means and all that rot. She wanted Theo, she tried many times over the years to win him. She wants me married, in America, so I'm out of the way, she tries to isolate me so I feel like pleasing my family is all I have left." Lena explained.

"Why would she want you out of the way?" Percy asked.

Lena smirked. "I'm the family jewel. Beautiful, desirable, intelligent. As close to Perfect as humanly possible. She wants that. She wants to be noticed. Praised. Wanted."

"Except you aren't." Percy pointed out.

Lena shook her head. "No, I'm not. But in my circle, it doesn't matter how you feel, only how you look. And I look like I have it all in hand."

Percy chuckled. "Your life is sort of fucked up, you know that, yeah?"

Lena gave him a rare smile. "You don't know the half of it, darling." They were silent a moment before she added: "I'll teach you a spell to ensure your mail gets to the proper recipient."

Percy figured that was as close to 'I missed you, too' as he was likely to get from her, and nodded his agreement.

Lena ended up fixing lunch, and if the familiarity if the gesture made them ache for Before... Well, at least they had this stolen afternoon.

After they washed up, they spent a good few hours wandering Godrick's Hollow in the crisp cold. Lena smoked, heavily. Percy pretended not to notice as he filled her in on everything that had been going on lately.

"So Reese dumped the parasite, but has continued sleeping with him?" Lena asked, snorting with amusement.

"Basically. And we snogged again. The night you left. But I couldn't stand the idea of him leaving me, just to hop in bed with him. So it hasn't happened since." The warm eyed teen confided.

"Well, that must be thoroughly none-awkward." Lena smirked around her cigarette.

"We manage, I guess." Percy shrugged before sneaking a sideways glance at Lena. "You doing okay?"

"Me? Oh I'm swell. Really." She deadpanned, rolling her eyes slightly.

"Clearly. You look like hell, Lenny."

"Oi! Piss off!" She laughed, pushing at Percy's shoulder.

"I'm serious! My gran looks better, and she's been dead three years." He slung an arm around Lena, feeling the sharp peaks of her shoulder blades dig into his skin uncomfortably.

"It's been sort of difficult, okay? There's a lot of stress, and I have to meet him Wednesday, and I'm not prepared for that at all. Plus, Draco knows him and, apparently, he has a less than savory reputation. I mean, honestly, for a supposedly neutral family, they sure do set me up with a lot of Death Eaters! I mean, seriously!" She exploded, cheeks pinkening with her growing irritation.

"Breathe, love. Slow down. Less than savory, how?" Percy questioned, squeezing her shoulder briefly in a gesture of comfort.

"Less than savory as in Head of a group of American Death Eaters. Beats his partners. Sadomasochist. Lovely chap." Lena replied monotonously.

"You can't marry him, Len!" Percy exclaimed, brow furrowed with worry.

"I haven't really been left with much of a choice here, Percy! Don't worry, I have a plan." She reassured, slipping a too thin arm around her best friend's waist.

"Please, share." Percy sounded skeptical.

"I'll marry him, give him an heir within the first year, then move into the summer house. I'll never have to see him. Anytime he comes to visit, I'll just coincide a visit home. Pureblood women have been doing it for generations." She reassured him, just as she had Draco.

"Yeah. Great plan. Except for one thing." Lena shot Percy a puzzled look, he realized she probably didn't remember. "You can't have children, Lena. The damage to your heart was too extensive."

He watched with alarm as Lena's already ashen skin paled impossibly, and she swayed briefly. He tightened his grip, sliding down to grasp her hip, offering stability.

"Oh fuck." She murmured, her expression nearing that of a full panic. "How did I forget that? Oh Salazar, he's going to kill me. I'll be useless. He'll dispose of me. Oh fuck!"

"It's okay. Seriously, it'll be fine. We'll figure it out, okay? We'll keep you safe. I swear, Len." Percy soothed, running calming strokes up her side.

“No, Percy, there isn’t time. He’ll be expecting me to sign the contract when we meet Wednesday. Unless I find a viable reason to stall, he has me backed into a corner. It isn’t just him I have to appease but Gaius and Amelia as well.” Lena took a deep, steadying breath.

“Come on, we need the whole gang if we’re gonna figure this out.” Percy responded resolutely, tugging Lena in the direction of his house.

x*x*x*x*x*

Percy felt infinitely blessed by the Fates when he received an Owl from his mum telling him she’d been held up at work and wouldn’t be home until late.

He fixed Lena a mug of tea and sat her in the parlor while he started making fire calls to bring everyone together. Forty-five minutes found Blaise Zabini, Draco Malfoy, Reese, Lena, and himself all seated comfortably staring at one another, waiting to see who would break the almost awkward silence.

“Lena can’t have kids.” Percy blurted suddenly, reddening when he caught Lena’s sharp glare. He hadn’t meant to be so blunt, but the way Draco was looking around made him feel simultaneously inferior and defensive, he had to say something. And it was going to have to come out eventually, it was the reason they were there after all.

“Oh….kay?” Reese drew the word out, looking at Percy like he’d lost his mind.

“Oh fuck. “ The Malfoy heir murmured quietly, his quicksilver eyes going wide momentarily in shock. “What do you mean you can’t have kids?!” He demanded, rounding on Lena.

“I had a head injury, okay? I’m sure there’s a lot about that week I don’t remember!” She defended haughtily.

“Anyone care to fill in the rest of the class?” Reese voiced peevishly, looking put out at clearly being the last to know.

Lena explained the situation in clipped sentences and blunt phrasing, looking older than her tender age.

“Now you see the problem. I’ve been very effectively backed into a corner.” Lena finished in a voice devoid of emotion.

“What the fuck is your family thinking? Setting you up with a man like that! Don’t they care?” Reese burst out.

The three Purebloods present looked at him with exasperation and pity.

“It isn’t that they don’t care, per se, I’m sure they care a great deal. But this is about more than Lena. It’s about the family reputation and fortune. Lena is… Well she is very visible. She is admired, emulated, and widely respected because she has always done things with elegance, respect, and propriety. Plus she is devastatingly beautiful, and incredibly intelligent. Everything a Pureblood heir could ever possibly desire in a wife.” Blaise explained gently, with a surprising lack of condescension. “But she has stepped out of line, and it’s all the more scandalous for how out of character it is for her. If our circle had caught wind of Lena’s living arrangements at Hogwarts, she would have been publicly punished and no heir in his right mind would touch her.”

“It was never like that with any of us! Nothing untoward ever happened between her and any of us! We were just trying to find some peace. We needed one another! I don’t know if you noticed but she’s falling apart at the seams!” Reese argued, snapping his mouth shut upon realising what he had said.

“It doesn’t matter what she needs or how she feels! No one gives a damn how we feel! It’s all about showing them what they want to see!” Draco half shouted in exasperation and anger.

“Would all of you please just stop. For whatever reason, it is happening. There’s nowhere left to hide.” Lena murmured, rubbing her temples as if to dispel a building headache.

“Right. The only thing left is making a plan to get you out.” Percy nodded, self assured.

Lena didn’t comment, merely giving the room a demure, yet empty, smile and rising to go check on Olliver.

x*x*x*x*x*

“You’re up.”

Oliver jerked in shock. “You’re actually… I thought I was hallucinating earlier when I heard your voice.” he murmured in a rough tone.

“Nope. You scared the piss out of Percy. You should probably apologize for that.” Lena gave him a sharp look. “He called me to come clean up the mess.”

They both sat in companionable, if somewhat awkward, silence for several moments.

“We should probably talk about this.” Lena began, visibly steeling herself for the conversation.

“I’d really rather not.”

“Yeah, well, we’re beyond preserving your feelings. If Percy hadn’t come in here, you could have bled to death, Oliver.” Lena continued when she realised he had no intention of answering her. “You do realise we’re setting up a rotation. You’re on suicide lockdown.”

“I wasn’t trying to kill myself!” He half shouted, shooting Lena an outraged glare.

“Right, and I’m likely to take you at your word.” Lena shot back, sarcasm dripping from her voice.

“I wasn’t!” He tried again, his posture becoming closed off and defensive.

“Oliver! There were wounds that, had you been attended to by a muggle, would have required stitches! How can you even sit there and try to tell me you weren’t looking to die, on some level?” Lena exclaimed fiercely. “This ends now. I get it, okay. Trust me, no one understands better than I. The nightmares, the guilt, the soul deep ache of everyday. You don’t heal from something like war. And this? I get this too. You’re trying to punish yourself. Trying to feel something, because at some point we all just shut off. It’s so much easier to just not feel at all. I understand. But can we maybe find a way to self-destruct that isn’t as likely to lead to a suicide? Accidental or otherwise.”

“I just...I was doing better, I thought. But then you left and it was like having the rug pulled from beneath my feet. You...You hold us together. You’re the glue. We had all given up on eachother. We were all in so much pain, we didn’t know how to reach out. Then you came sweeping in like a sassy Fairy God Mother; You found my parents, gave Reese an outlet, and began to slowly put Percy back together. Honestly, how could we not love you? And then you were just….gone. And you couldn’t talk to us, and you wouldn’t look at us, and we had to watch you slowly regress. I mean, fuck, at least we still had eachother. Even if what we needed was you.” Oliver ran a hand through his hair in frustration. “It wasn’t a suicide attempt, swear to God it wasn’t. Just….trying to find some peace, I guess.”

“I’m not worth your life, Oliver. I left. I didn’t want to, but it wasn’t a choice left up to me. Just because I left, didn’t mean I ever stopped loving you. Any of you. I acted the way I did because I thought it would make it easier on you all. I’m sorry you felt abandoned, but this? This isn’t how you cope! For Salazar’s sake, Oliver, you survived a war! But you can’t handle one insignificant girl walking out the door? Why didn’t you go sit with Percy when you realised this is where you were headed?” Lena could feel her temper grow short, this whole thing was absolutely senseless.

“I didn’t want to bother him.” Oliver murmured.

“That. Is the _stupidest_ thing that has ever come out of your mouth.” Lena shouted, completely losing her temper. “Seriously? You didn’t want to bother him? Because he’s so busy, right? He’s your best friend you bloody _fucking_ idiot! Your best friend who was _literally right down the hall!_ ”

Percy and Blaise sauntered in, having heard the commotion from downstairs.

“Everything alright?” Blaise asked pleasantly, an absent smile twisting his full lips.

Percy snorted. “Lena shouted ‘fuck’ so I’m gonna go with no.”

“Percy.” Lena rounded her infuriated gaze on the Keeper. “To your knowledge, have you ever given Oliver the impression that he couldn’t come to you in the event of a meltdown such as the one he had here today?”

Percy looked taken aback. “Not at all! In fact I’ve reminded him several times that I’m just down the hall should he need me.”

Lena was back to Oliver, glare turned up to ten. ‘ _If looks could kill...’_ Percy thought absently.

“So. Care to explain to me why you didn’t go to your best friend, who was _right down the hall,_ might I add?” She snapped.

Oliver kept his eyes on the bed spread. ‘ _Wise move, Merlin knows what she’d do to him if he made eye contact right now._ ’ Percy smirked to himself. He liked to refer to this as ‘Wolf Mode.’ Sure, Lena was pissed, but only because she loved you so much. She got a little like a mother wolf. Personally, Percy recommended rolling on your back and baring your throat.

“I swear on my father’s grave, Oliver, if this happens again I will make your life a living Hell. Are we clear?” The chastisement was clear in her tone, but her eyes were yearning to cuddle the teen in question. As soon as she had his acknowledgement she launched herself into his lap, wrapping her arms around him as he buried his face in her neck, a sob already breaking loose from the back of his throat.

Percy and Blaise watched in amusement as Lena proceeded to comfort Oliver, stroking soothing circles over his shoulders, bringing a hand up to stroke through his hair. “I love you. Gods, I love you. Please don’t ever doubt that again.” Percy was shocked to hear a note of pleading in Lena’s usually lofty voice.

“I love you, too.” He gasped against her throat.

“Shhh, I know that, darling. I know.” She soothed

x*x*x*x*x*

The wee hours of Wednesday morning found Lena pacing her bedroom floor, cigarette in hand, and music maybe a few decibels too loud considering the hour. But fuck it, Lena was panicking.

She took a deep drag, trying to ease the mindless, looping, anxiety-ridden soundtrack her brain seemed stuck on.

‘ _What would Theo do?_ ’ It was the same question she always asked when faced with a difficult puzzle. Theo had this maddening ability to come out of every situation smelling like roses, it was at least ¾ of the reason he had been placed in Slytherin. He was a slippery bastard. The other ¼ of the reason was his ridiculous ability to solve literally every riddle man had managed to conjure. Theo’s mind was… an intoxicating force.

Lena was okay admitting that every once in a while, she found she needed to channel those abilities.

‘ _Poison him_.’ Came the astute reply in a voice entirely too similar to her dead fiance’s for Lena’s comfort.

Well. That was all right and good but she wouldn’t survive in Azkaban. Besides, Theo was rarely so heavy handed.

A large grey owl swooped through Lena’s window, and with it, a plan began taking form in her mind.

_‘Dearest, Darling, Lena,_  
 _Today is the day. Just breathe; Oliver, Reese, and I will be in Diagon Alley. We’ll keep an eye out._  
 _Get through this meeting and it will all be over before the next one can roll around. I promise._  
 _Oliver says hello and he loves you. Also, good luck. But that goes for both of us._

_Be Strong. We’ll Keep You Safe._

_Love,_  
 _Percy_

Lena read through the short note twice before rolling her eyes and tossing it onto her bed. She appreciated the sentiment behind the letter, honestly she did, but she couldn’t quite figure out when she began giving off the impression she needed to be taken care of.

Especially by that lot. There were very few in her circle who would be less capable of handling this situation. She loved them to bits, but they didn’t have the qualities necessary to deal with this.

Lena lit a new cigarette as she worked through the kinks in her plan.

Half a pack later, and the sun was just beginning to peek over the horizon. Lena admired it absently before going to her fireplace.

“Blaisius Marcos Zabini, Zabini Manor and Estate.” Lena’s voice was rough from disuse and the blatant abuse of nicotine.

“Mmmm. Morning, darling.” Blaise’s sleep dazed face appeared in the flames.

“Oh. Merlin, Blaise! I’m so sorry! I didn’t even consider the time!” Lena rushed, feeling her cheeks heat in a blush.

Philippe appeared over Blaise’s shoulder. “Quel est le probleme, mon cherie?”

Lena appeared chagrined when she answered “ Je suis desole, je ne voulais pas appele si tot. J’ai besoin de l’aide de votre amant.”

Philippe waved her off with a sweet smile. He tended to be incredibly forgiving of the people he was fond of. “Vous etes de la famille, ne pense rien de lui.”

Lena answered with a sweet smile and a murmured thank you, adding an uncertain affectionate declaration before quickly dropping her gaze to the carpet.

Philippe murmured her name, and Lena knew that, had they been in the same room, he would be gently lifting her chin.

She darted a glance up to catch Blaise’s amused gaze and Philippe’s soft, openly affectionate grin. “Nous vous aimons, trop.” With that, he stood and caressed Blaise’s cheek before murmuring something to him and leaving Lena’s view.

“Have you slept in the last 24 hours?” Blaise asked, getting his first good look at Lena.

“Sleep hasn’t been easy to come by lately.” She refused to be ashamed. Besides, insomnia beat an addiction to Dreamless Sleep any day. “I didn’t call at this ungodly hour to discuss my sleeping habits.”

“Of course you didn’t, that would imply you had an iota of care for your own well-being.” Blaise snarked.

Lena gave him a withering glare. “How many bedrooms does the cottage you bought for Mr. Milner have?”

The question clearly caught Blaise off guard. “Uh, three. Why?”

Lena nodded absently, mentally slotting that information into the file containing all the extraneous information pertaining to her plan. “And I own it outright? My family has absolutely no claim to it?”

“Actually, it is owned under your alias. I feared putting your name on it would attract...unwanted attention.” Blaise admitted. “You know, everything you’re asking could have been answered if you had bothered to go through the paperwork I gave you.”

“I destroyed that paperwork before we even left the Three Broomsticks.” At Blaise’s incredulous look Lena smirked. “What? I couldn’t have that sort of information laying about, I didn't even have a secure place to store it. Plus, I knew you would have a spare set of those documents in your vault.”

Blaise just shook his head, a good natured smile lighting his face. “Sometimes I forget how sharp you are, Lena. You hide it so well.”

“Yes, well, it’s better to be underestimated.” She replied mysteriously, giving her own sly smirk.

“You aren’t going to tell me your plan, are you?” Blaise asked her.

“Not yet. Still a few kinks to work out.” Lena flashed him a dazzling smile, momentarily softening the malnourished sharpness her face had acquired. “I apologize again for waking you, Blaise. I promise, I’ll tell you soon, okay?”

Blaise nodded, waving off her apology. “Anytime you need me, Lena. You know that. I love you, and be very careful. We’ll see you tomorrow.” He finished with a wolfish grin.

“Tomorrow?” Lena puzzled. “But I’ll be in Diagon Alley most of the day.”

“Oh, didn’t I tell you? Philippe made reservations for Nightingales. 12:30 sharp.” He smirked at her dumbstruck look. “Get some sleep, loveling. You look wretched.” he finished, before severing the connection.

x*x*x*x*x*

Lena piled her long curls into a semi-formal updo, just messy enough to be stylish and cute, but clean enough to let everyone know a lot of effort had gone into it. She straightened the navy blue gown, and carefully chose a necklace that was the perfect length to draw attention to her cleavage.

If anyone had told Lena a few weeks ago that she would be putting so much careful consideration into her appearance for this lunch, she would have immediately rang St. Mungos for them.

As it stood, she was layering careful glamour charms over herself, building the illusion of the soft curves and healthy glow recent stress and insomnia had stolen from her.

She heard her door softly click as Amelia entered. Her sister circled her slowly before nodding her approval somewhat reluctantly.

“Your spellwork has improved.” Came the backhanded compliment.

“Come now, Amelia, your jealousy is showing. Lena’s spellwork has always been light years ahead of yours.” Draco’s smooth voice interrupted as he stepped gracefully from the fireplace, magicking the soot from his robes.

“Draco.” Amelia greeted coldly. “To what do I owe the pleasure?”

“Oh, sweetheart, trust me, pleasure is never something I aspire to bring you.” Draco delivered in the same, smooth tone. “Your manners are lacking, dear. This is not your room. The fireplace I came through was not yours. Therefore, we must draw the conclusion it is not you I came for, please remember to never overstep your boundaries again. Not all company is as forgiving as I am.” Draco finished, a dangerous edge to his voice.

Draco had never liked Amelia. She was cold, cruel, and needlessly vicious towards Lena. Plus, she had married his parasite of a cousin. Draco had been searching for redeeming qualities in the woman for years. She had a beauty that was all genetics, careful dieting, and conscientiously applied makeup. Her intelligence was limited, and her spellwork mediocre at best. Besides being a notoriously malicious gossip. Draco had watched for years as Theo had to fix the damage Amelia would do to Lena’s self-esteem.

All in all, Draco found he had very little patience for the woman.

“Of course, Mister Malfoy. My sincerest apologies.” She murmured, all false sweetness before turning back to Lena. “I suppose you look as pretty as you’re likely to. You ought to get going soon, wouldn’t do for you to be late.”

Lena felt a lump form in her throat and bit her cheek to keep the tears from forming. No one could ever make her feel as bad about herself in 1,000 words as Amelia could in ten. She gave a sharp nod of acknowledgement, watching as her sister swept from the room with an elegance Lena envied.

“Don’t you dare allow her to do this to you! Lena Calysta Grey, you listen to me. You are an incredible woman. Pretty? Who would ever want to be merely ‘pretty’? Those two silly syllables are not worthy of who you are and all that you’ve become. Do not ever allow five little letters destroy you. Do you understand me? Never contain yourself in such a vapid expression.” Draco had grabbed Lena’s face, cradling it between his palms.

Lena nodded meekly, forcing herself to swallow past the tightness in her throat.

“I mean it. You are intoxicating, Lena. Not because you were blessed with good genetics, but because you are a beautiful person.” He whispered, pressing a kiss to her forehead.

Lena met his eye wearily, the whole situation reminded her terribly of Theo.

“Come on, dearheart. I’m your escort.” The heir offered his arm.

Lena shook her head, clearing it. She needed to be at her best if her plan was to succeed. “All right, just one more thing.” She went to her closet, pulling a bottle from the back of a shelf. “Try not to breathe in my perfume, Draco.” She advised before spraying each of her pulse points.

Draco nodded, casting a quick Air Purifying charm around himself before pulling Lena to the fireplace. “The Leaky Cauldron, Diagon Alley.”

x*x*x*x*x*

Lena and Draco ended up running into Philippe and Blaise, quite literally, outside Flourish and Blotts. Philippe stopped to give Lena a quick hug. As he held her, she felt him bury his nose in her neck, and Lena barely managed to restrain a cringe.

“Vous sentez comme la cannelle, et la vanille, et….chocolat noir.” Philippe took a deeper sniff, burrowing more solidly into Lena.

“Philippe.” Lena murmured, a warning edge to her tone.

But at the same moment, Blaise leaned in to take a whiff. “No. She smells of leather, old books, sandalwood, and….spearmint?”

Draco felt a lightbulb go off above his head. “Of course” He murmured, grinning widely. Sometimes, even he forgot how sharp Lena was.

“If you boys are finished sniffing my charge, I believe we all must be off.” Draco intervened with an amused smirk, reaching again for Lena.

As they were walking towards the restaurant, Draco leaned in to discreetly smell the teen’s neck. He was curious, so sue him.

He wasn’t disappointed. She smelled of good Italian espresso, black cherries, and fresh fennel. Overall, it was an intoxicating experience. Draco now understood why she had warned him against it, he felt as though he could bury his face in her neck and never surface again. It was a humiliating urge.

“I thought the plan was to repel him.” Draco murmured in Lena’s ear just as the restaurant came into focus.

“You don’t know anything about the plan, Draco. Do not embarrass yourself further by persisting in pretending you understand what I’m doing.” Lena whispered back, softening her harsh words with a small smile. “All of you just need to calm down, I have everything in hand. And I’ll explain when I’m good and ready.”

Draco hummed in response. He trusted Lena, knew she would ask for help if she needed it, but she more than likely wouldn’t. Her plans had never, to his recollection, failed to run perfectly. He just needed to have patience, and make sure he was prepared to bail her out should things go pear shaped. Of course, contingency plans are a fuck of a lot easier when one knew the game that was being played.

x*x*x*x*x*

“Miss. Grey?” A very tall, very attractive, man caught Lena’s attention from just inside the door.

“Indeed. Mr. Grant, I presume?” She smiled sweetly, meeting his gaze bashfully.

“What gave me away?” He smirked devilishly, his eyes roaming her form with a hungry intensity.

“Your accent, to be sure. Not many Americans hang around Diagon Alley.” Lena had slipped closer, discreetly waving Draco off.

“I find that surprising; why with witches such as yourself about, it’s a wonder half the wizarding population doesn’t congregate here!” Came his smarmy response.

Lena forced a pretty blush. “You flatter me, sir.”

Mr. Grant’s chest puffed up at her term of respect, as Lena knew it would. She pressed her body delicately into his, shifting so her perfume would waft up to him. “Shall we be seated? I’m famished.”

The tall American looked momentarily dazed, swaying more firmly into Lena before agreeing distractedly, taking her arm to lead her to their table.

It wasn’t half as terrible as Lena thought it would be. Max, as he had insisted she call him, was rather charming, and very intelligent. His cerulean eyes were sort of distracting, and he had dimples when he smiled. Plus Lena had never spent much time around Americans, and she was absolutely fascinated by his accent.

And yet, for all his positive traits, Lena still spent half of lunch controlling the overwhelming urge to hex him to oblivion.

He made comments about her eating habits, her choice of wine, her ‘practically pasty’ skin, and her, apparently, manic depressive disposition. He was a passive-aggressive, ego-centric, hedonistic, narcissist. And, honestly, Lena didn’t have time for this. Although it made her job 1,000 times easier. She just let him talk, murmuring her agreement, and pretending his blatantly rude remarks regarding herself were valuable opinions to be carefully considered.

“So, I have the contract here, if you would like to sign it. Just standard stuff regarding fortune, heirs, and a time frame.” He began, turning to grab his briefcase.

“Yes, of course! Hand it here, have you a pen?” Lena feigned enthusiasm, clamping down hard on a bubble of laughter when she spotted Blaise’s face in her periphery. ‘Well, that’s what he gets for eavesdropping.’ she thinks, before leaning over to sign the contract with a flourish. Smothering a laugh in her palm when she glances over to see Blaise half out of his chair, hand extended towards her. ‘You would think they don’t trust me.’

“Well, now that that is done, I look forward to our union.” Max smiled warmly, and leaned over the table to kiss her cheek before glancing at his watch and cursing. “I’m sorry, Darling, but I have another meeting in half an hour.” he explained, gathering his things to leave.

“Not at all! Please keep in touch.” Lena smiled sweetly, standing to properly say goodbye before watching him stumble dazedly out of the restaurant.

x*x*x*x*x*

“Reese, for the love of Merlin tell me you have a cigarette.” Lena murmured into his ear. She had spotted the boys inside the Apothecary and decided to sneak up on them.

“Mother of- Lena! Wear a fucking bell!” Reese exclaimed, shoving his wand back into the holster on his forearm.

“If you practiced Constant Vigilance, I wouldn’t need one.” She responded cheekily, kissing the underside of his jaw. “Cigarette?”

“Yeah, come on.” He kissed the top of her head before leading her to the alley behind the row of shops.

They both lit up and settled against the wall. “You’re in an awfully good mood.” Reese remarked after several minutes of silence.

Lena flicked the ash off her half done smoke before answering. “I’ve regained the upper-hand.”

“Meaning, what, exactly?” Reese squinted at her in the deeply shaded shadow of the wall they were leaning against.

“Meaning: I am no longer a puppet.” Lena replied with a triumphant smirk.

“You’ll tell me when you’re ready?” Reese confirmed.

“I’ll tell you when I’m ready.” Lena assured him.

“LENA CALYSTA GREY!” Blaise came barreling down the alley towards her, a worried looking Philippe hot on his trail.

Lena heaved a put upon sigh, she had been hoping to put this off until later. “Yes, darling?”

“Don’t play innocent with me! You signed the contract! You bound yourself to him!” Blaise half shouted, trying to control himself.

“You _what_?” Reese demanded with rising panic.

“I told you all once, I will tell you only once more: _I have it all under control_. I need you to trust me, and know that I will come to you when it is time.” Lena responded firmly, splitting her glance between the three before crushing the finished cigarette under-heel and moving to the nearest Floo, pointedly ignoring her name being shouted from behind her.

x*x*x*x*x*

Lena was pulled from sleep abruptly by an additional weight dropping onto her mattress, she moved just as quickly, pulling her wand from beneath her pillow and rolling on top of the intruder, shoving her wand into their throat.

Percy merely smiled, wrapping his arms around her waist, seemingly unconcerned with the dangerous situation.

Lena blinked twice before tossing her wand on the bedside table. “What are you doing here at-” she checked her watch “2:53 in the morning?”

“Couldn’t sleep.” came the quiet reply.

Lena moved to lay beside Percy, but he just tightened his arms, unwilling to relinquish the contact. Lena collapsed her weight onto him instead, trusting the Keeper could bear it easily.

“You okay?” She murmured, tracing the lines of his face in the bleached light of the moon.

 “Hmm? Yeah, I suppose.” He smiled up, the position offering them potential for soul-bearing intimacy. “What about you? You were actually sleeping.” his smile turned approving, like Lena sleeping was some sort of major accomplishment.

Given her life recently, he probably wasn’t far off.

“I’m fine. I found that a Calming Draught is just strong enough to give me a few solid hours of sleep. It’s better than nothing.” She whispered back, laying her head over his heart. “I’ve missed this.” she admitted.

Perhaps it was the late hour. Or the light of the half-full moon. Maybe it was the intimate position, the feeling of deja-vu, or the impression that everything had come full circle; but Lena couldn’t manage embarrassment over her confession.

“I don’t sleep as well without you.” Percy brought a hand up to drag through her hair.

They were silent a long while before Percy spoke up again. “Reese is in my bed. Does the fact I couldn’t stand to fall asleep next to him make me a bad person?”

Lena looked up at her best friend. “Why is he in your bed?”

“He...We...uh.” Percy looked close to tears, his voice wavering.

“Oh sweetheart!” Lena exclaimed, wrapping herself around him. “I’m so sorry.”

“Not your fault, I’m the one who let it happen.” Percy responded, but his grip tightened on her almost painfully.

Lena looked up, alarmed. “Percy, sex isn’t something you ‘let happen’. It’s something you participate in. Something mutual. It _was_ mutual, right?”

Percy shrugged as best he could in his current horizontal position. “He needed it, I could see that. I’m his best friend, I couldn’t just say no. I guess it doesn’t matter what I wanted, I waived my rights when I lifted the blanket for him.”

“There’s always a choice Percy-” Lena cut herself off when she heard Percy snort. “What?”

“He came to me in the dead of night, looking absolutely wrecked and more beautiful than I’ve ever seen him and you think I had any sort of choice? Fuck, Lena, I would do anything for him, regardless of personal repercussions and he knows that. I love him. I love him so much that finally having sex with him hurts. Hurts in a way that I wasn’t prepared to have to deal with. I feel panicked, and hurt, and scared, and dirty, and nauseous, and _I don’t know what to do with that._ ” Percy was full blown sobbing at this point.

“Then shame on him for using you like that! I’m sorry. I’m so sorry this had to happen to you, Percy. Just because you physically agreed doesn’t mean you gave your emotional consent. And that’s probably worse, right? Because you weren’t raped. You never said no. But I’ll bet you wanted to, probably a dozen times or more, right?” Lena paused, waiting for Percy’s nod before continuing. “It’s like being raped only almost worse because you have no one to blame but yourself. He would have stopped if you said, would have respected your boundaries but you were so set on saving him you forgot to look after yourself. And you’re left in the aftermath wondering where the hell to go with this. How to even begin coping with the fact that your virginity was given to a boy that didn’t want you even half as much as he did the comfort he could find in a warm body. But it was a choice you made, and now you have to live with it.”

“You’ve been through this.”

It wasn’t even a question, but Lena treated it like one. “Everyone has a sexual encounter they regret. Just because Theo was my fiance and I loved him doesn’t mean there wasn’t a time or two I question whether the sex was a mutual thing or something I was using to fix him, or as an apology.”

“I just...He wouldn’t even _look_ at me. Forced me onto my hands and knees so he didn’t have to-” Percy broke off, drawing in a shuddering breath before shaking his head, the tears coming faster now.

There was nothing left to say. Nothing could ever make this better, Lena knew that. Hell, Theo was dead and there are still a few memories of sexual encounters between them that make Lena’s stomach turn.

So she held onto him, and swore to herself that she would find him someone wonderful. Someone who would love him the way he deserved to be loved, who would realise what a wonderful man he was and treasure him as such because, fuck, if anyone deserved that, it was Percy.

Percy eventually cried himself to sleep, wrapped in his best friends embrace.

x*x*x*x*x*

Yule morning Percy crept through the floo, sneaking up to Lena’s bed.

“Rise and shine, dove, you’ve presents to open.” he sang quietly, pushing her hair away from her face.

“Mmm. Presents?” She murmured, disoriented.

‘Gods she couldn’t possibly be any cuter.’ He thought as he watched her brow furrow and her lips pout in confusion.

“Yep, presents. C’mon.” he cajoled, beginning to pull the breakfast he packed out of his satchel.

“Juice?”

Percy chuckled, everything was a question for about the first hour Lena was awake. Almost as if she wasn’t completely convinced she wasn’t still dreaming, needing constant confirmation that things were really happening around her.

“Juice. And tea. And some scones my mum made. Also, fruit and yoghurt.” Percy confirmed. Finished pulling out the components of the light breakfast, he began bodily removing Lena from the bed.

“But...presents?” she asked again, still quite a ways from lucid.

“Yes, it's Christmas, darling!” Percy chirped, guiding her to sit on the floor with him.

“Happy Christmas?” She took the tea he handed her gratefully.

“Happy Christmas.” He confirmed, giving her a huge smile.

x*x*x*x*x*

“Lena…. What are you doing?”

Lena turned to see Gaius standing in the doorway of her room, watching her pack her trunk.

“Packing for school.” Her tone was firm, leaving no room for argument.

“Didn’t Amelia speak with you? You aren't going back.” Gaius rubbed the back of his neck in a nervous tick.

“Oh no, she spoke with me. I just decided I didn't care.” Lena shrugged fluidly, turning back to enchanting her robes against wrinkling before folding them.

“Lena!” Gaius exclaimed in a scolding tone.

“Yes?” She responded calmly, eyebrow raised.

“How dare you-”

"How dare I? How dare _I_? How dare _you_! I am 17 years old, and I may still be a child in many respects, but I am old enough to make my own decisions according to Wizarding Law. So here’s my decision; I am going to finish out the last year and a half of my education with my friends, living in the old professor’s quarters, as we were before Amelia threw a bitch fit and you decided to become her doormat.” Lena responded fiercely.

“I forbid it!” Gaius declared, anger colouring the apples of his cheeks.

“It’s funny, you’re saying that as if I actually give a damn.” Lena’s tone dripped with cynical amusement.

Gaius sputtered for a moment before half shouting her full name.

Before Gaius could work up to a rant, Lena stuck her magically shrunk trunk into her pocket and stepped through the floo.

x*x*x*x*x*

“It’s all part of the plan?” Percy reiterated what she had been saying for weeks.

“It’s all part of the plan.” She affirmed. “And I think it’s about time you heard it.”


End file.
